So 2 years after I lost weight with L.A. Weight Loss, I had gained all the weight back. I was on my binge phase. I ate mostly doughnuts, cakes, and fast food. I was up to 155 pounds. I looked up L.A. Weight Loss but they had shut down their stores by then. I adapted their diet plan. So for breakfast, I would have half of a 100 calorie bagel with some butter on it. I would either have an apple or applesauce with it and then 8 oz. of milk. For a snack in between breakfast and lunch, I would have a 100 calorie snack pack. For lunch, it would either be 3 cups of spinach and 3 ounces of fish or 2 cups of lettuce and 4 ounces of chicken. I found that salad dressing had too many calories in it so I started to use the honey mustard sauce instead for salad dressing. Another 100 calorie snack pack in between lunch and dinner. For dinner, it was either 1/2 cup cooked vegetables and some meat. I basically ate like that until I lost 30 pounds. I could only keep up with this diet for about 7 months. I found that when I said no to foods that I liked, I would get this weird high. I felt in control and powerful because I could say no to bad foods. At the time I thought I was in control but I wasn’t. It made me feel good, when people said that I looked like I was losing weight. There would come a point, every day that I would feel like I was about to pass out. My ears would start ringing and I would feel faint. I didn’t pass out, I just took 2 deep breaths and the feeling would pass. Every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, I would do an hour of cardio. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I would do pilates. I would also drink about 5 or 6 water bottles a day.
I just started my first travel job last Thursday. I moved down to Macon,GA on October 24th. My mom came with me to help me. It’s about a two hour drive from my parent’s house to Macon. We left a little later than we wanted to so my mom couldn’t stay and help me unpack. When I was watching my mom drive away, I felt very overwhelmed and lonely. I was out of my comfort zone. I was in a strange town. My closest family was about 30 minutes away. All my life, I was used to being around the Atlanta area or surrounded by family and friends. Even when I went away to college, I was only 30 minutes from my parents and I had my best friends at college with me. This is the first time in my life that I’ve been by myself. I’ve wanted to be a travel nurse for about 10 years now. I didn’t think about how I would feel when I actually became a travel nurse. After my mom went back home, I went grocery shopping. Thank God I chose an extended stay hotel with a full kitchen. While at the grocery store I picked up some Krispy Kreme doughnuts, the 6 pack. I haven’t had a craving for doughnuts in about 2 months when I had to move back in with my parents for a while. I still bought healthier foods too. When I got back to my hotel room, I immediately ate the doughnuts. I couldn’t finish all 6 of them which surprised me. When I was eating doughnuts every day, I was able to put 6 down with no problem. After 4 I was full. I knew why I was craving the doughnuts, I was craving comfort. I didn’t know the area. It also didn’t help that I couldn’t call my best friend. She was in Nigeria dealing with her own problems. I emailed my health coach. I had forgotten that I could have called her. I wrote down in my journal everything that I was feeling. In those first 2 days, I literally rethought my decision to become a travel nurse. I told myself that I would give myself a month. If I was still feeling like this in a month, then I would go back to Atlanta and find a permanent job at a hospital. I’ve wanted to be a travel nurse ever since a travel nurse came to speak to our class in LPN school back in 2004. It combines the two things I love, traveling and nursing. God even showed me that I was going to be a travel nurse. I’m going to meet my future husband while I’m a travel nurse. Even knowing all those things, I still wanted to turn around and go back to my comfort zone. By the end of the first week, I was starting to feel comfortable being in Macon. When I started the travel job, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. The nurses on the floor are helpful and they don’t mind me asking a lot of questions. I thought I would be thrown out on the floor without orientation. I had orientation on Thursday and I worked on Friday and Saturday. Even after just 2 days, I’m getting back into the swing of nursing. I took a 3 month break before I started this job. I’m no longer feeling overwhelmed. I went to a yoga class on Sunday. Thank God my health coach found a yoga studio. When I was telling the yoga instructor that I was a travel nurse, I felt very happy and proud of myself. I’m finally living one of my dreams. It took 10 years to manifest but with God and my health coach, I did it. It feels so surreal sometimes when I wake up and realize that I’m living one of my dreams. I used to be afraid to live this dream because then what would my dream be next. I was afraid of what was to come next. I didn’t know what my next dream would be. God has showed me what my next dream will be. Stay tuned!!!!