Advice from my Dad

My dad was sick recently and I was so scared and nervous. Before the surgery, he was telling me all the things that I need to do in the event of his passing. He has made detailed handouts of all the things that I need to do.

The advice that he always said is that just like you prepare to live, you have to prepare to die.

You save up for retirement, you put money aside in case of emergencies, you have health insurance, and there are multiple other things that you need to live.

“The average cost of a funeral is between $7,000 and $12,000”. 2021 Breakdown of Average Funeral Costs (Cremation, Burial, Etc) – Lincoln Heritage ( This article breaks down what you are paying for in a funeral. A funeral is more expensive than I thought it was.

If the person hasn’t prepared and put any money aside or already paid for some of the things, then who will pay for the funeral. Usually it will fall on a family member to pay and plan. A person has to be buried or cremated. If I were to die right now, I have not prepared anything. My parents would probably have to pay and plan my funeral. I haven’t discussed my plans with them. I would probably get buried.

I have put in thought about what I want done when I die. I want to be cremated and I want my ashes spread in the ocean. I want my ashes to be spread around killer whales. I joked with the captain of the whale watching company in California that I don’t want to be thrown out there when you see some common dolphins or grey whales. It has to be killer whales. I also want to be an organ donor.

Also having a living will is a good idea. I have seen some patients not have a will and the next of kin has to make decisions for them. If you have never talked to your family about what you want when something happens then they are going to do what they think is right for you. The patient may not have wanted to be on life support but since the matter was never discussed, the next of kin don’t know what the patient wanted.

I know that I don’t like to discuss or even think about the topic of my parents death.

I do appreciate that my dad has made a detailed handout because when a person dies, it is hard for the family to process everything that is needed to be done. You are suddenly thrust into grief and on top of that you still may have to work and plan the funeral dates. If the person has already planned their funeral it makes it a little bit easier.

I don’t like to discuss this topic with my dad but I also do see the necessity in it. Over the years, he tells me things about what I need to do when he passes.

No one is promised to grow old, some people die when they are still young. Some people get into accidents and then cannot make decisions for themselves.

Just like you have to prepare to live, you have to prepare to die.

I don’t like to think about my death too much. I know it’s going to happen one day but I don’t like thinking about it. It do think it would be right of me to put some money aside for my funeral expenses so that way no one else would have to pay for me. Especially since I want to be cremated and put out to sea with some killer whales. I have a friend that works for a whale watching company in Alaska. That is probably the best place to see killer whales year round. That would probably be the company that I would go with to do the burial at sea.

Maybe in this coming week, just think a little about what you want when you pass. Do you want a funeral or to be cremated? How is it going to be paid for? What do you want to be in your will?

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