Am I My Friend’s Keeper?


For the past 2 weeks, something my ex best friend has been bothering me.  She told me that it wasn’t her job to teach me how to be a good friend.  I appreciate the lesson that this statement has taught me.

But I respectfully disagree, it is our job to teach our friends how to treat us.

As I am growing and learning, I’ve found that what once worked for me doesn’t work for me anymore.  I don’t care anymore about celebrity gossip like I used to.  I like to talk about my dreams, past lives, and what I’m learning.  I’ve gotten back into reading books, which I used to do before nursing school happened.  I’ve always been a quiet person but now I’m sharing my experiences and lessons that I’ve learned.  Now I speak up when someone does me wrong and I don’t stay silent like I used to do.

But let me be clear, it is not your job to babysit people.  There is a big difference between telling someone how you like to be treated, and constantly having to remind them to be nice to you.

After you tell the person how you like to be treated, it is now up to that person to decide what to do with that information.  You may lose some people because of it but that is ok.  Maybe they will change and they can remain in your life and be supportive.  I have never liked it when people have pointed out my flaws but I do recognize that it is a necessary part of life.  It helps me to grow.  I also recognize that some of my “flaws” are a part of who I am.  Some people have said that I’m too nice and they have told me it is a flaw.  I don’t see that as a flaw, I see it as an awesome part of myself.  For example, when I go to work I may have to give a patient an enema.  I don’t like giving an enema but I also recognize that it is a part of my job.  My first enema didn’t go so well, poop was flying everywhere.

So I say yes you are your friend’s teacher, but more so, you are your own advocate!
It is your life and you have the power to choose who will stay in your life and who won’t.  As a nurse, I have to be my patient’s advocate.  I have to speak up for them.  Sometimes that means that I have to go against what the patient wants for their own good.  I’m not giving a patient Dilaudid and Morphine at the same time.  I’m not trying to have my patient see Jesus.  In life you have to be your own advocate and sometimes that will mean that you need to let go of some people in your life.  Not because they are bad people but because they no longer serve a positive role in your life. Sometimes people may let you go and that’s ok too.  I appreciate everyone who is in my life right now.   They love me through the good and the bad.

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