As I was walking up the mountain, a beautiful black and blue butterfly flew in front of me for a while.
I realized that I’m like that butterfly right now. Life is dealing me some punches right now, leaving me black and blue, but still beautiful. I’m still living and learning.
On the way to the mountain, it looked like it was going to start raining. I still wanted to go. I made it to the top of the mountain and the clouds were coming in and the thunder and lightning had started. It was such a beautiful sight. It didn’t start raining until I was in the parking lot when I was done. God takes care of me even in the midst of the storm.
I recently read a book, A Short Course in Happiness After Loss, by Maria Sirois. Before I even opened the book, the cover photo spoke to me. The cover photo is of a bowl with gold in the cracks of it. I remembered in the Japanese culture, if an object breaks, the cracks are filled with gold. The cracks become a part of the story of that object. The author talks about that in the book. Kintsukuroi is the art of filling in the cracks of an object with gold. My heartbreak is just going to become a part of my story.
One the quotes in the book, really spoke to me.
“Our greatest freedom is the freedom to choose our attitude.” – Viktor Frankl.
In the middle of my heartbreak, I was choosing to be sad. I needed to feel that. It was okay for me to feel that. In the middle of loss, its okay to feel whatever comes up. It is also okay to feel happy. I can choose to see the beauty in the moment.
Even when other people are telling me that I haven’t changed in 10 years or that my life choices are wrong, I can still find the beauty in the situation. Those people care about me. They choose to show their love by voicing their opinions and telling me their concerns about my life. I don’t have to take their opinions or concerns about my life and make it my own. I know that I’ve changed and I don’t have to prove it to anybody else. I have to live my life how I want to live my life.
In any situation, we have the choice to choose how we feel.
At this moment, I choose to be happy. I’m hopeful about the future.
A friend told me recently that I’m glowing from the inside. She has seen my transformation since I started working with my life coach.
I’m happy with my life choices and the path that I’m on. I am a beautiful spiritual being.